Broad and bumpy is the garden toad
That sits on rocks by pond water.
Enduring storms, blizzards, bouncing dogs,
Drum and bass, water balloon fights,
Metal rakes and once, Alan Titchmarsh’s fingertips,
This spartan beast of Rome,
Black trident down his spine, throat of might,
Protects the porcelain garden gnome
Long days and long nights.